When it comes to appropriate date talk, most people can agree on what’s OK to discuss and what should never be mentioned. For example, you should never bring up your ex, especially on a first date, and when you are finally ready to talk about your ex, say, a few weeks into the relationship, you shouldn't say anything bad about them. Another topic that most people agree that should be avoided is religion, because no matter what god you pray to, it’s always a sticky situation. Always.
The third subject that most agree should also be avoided in the early stages of a relationship is politics. Similar to religion, it’s a sticky and, even if you attempt to have a civilized debate about it, is likely to end up in an argument – especially if you and your date are on other ends of the political spectrum. However, with it being an election year, it seems almost impossible to NOT talk about politics. I mean, it’s everywhere.
Instead of finding yourself in a debate (read: argument) that you really don’t want to have about the state of politics in this country, here are seven ways to avoid talking about politics on a date, no matter how political you actually might be.
1. If Donald Trump comes up in conversation, ask if he’s the guy from The Apprentice, then leave it at that.
Well, he is the guy from The Apprentice… among a few other things that we’d like to forget based on the last few months. (Yes, I’m alluding to him talking about his, um, penis size at a GOP debate, among other things.)
2. When asked whether you’re Team Hillary or Team Bernie, tell the asker you’re not really into sports.
As much as I don’t condone any woman acting dumb, desperate times require desperate measures. Besides, it’s not like there’s only one Hillary or Bernie in the world, so it’s not totally off base that you’d be confused… right? I mean, I can list two dozen women named Hillary right this very second.
3. If your date mentions something about the most recent debate, point out how you’ve been too busy for TV.
Well, sure, you’ve managed to make time for the entire fourth season of House of Cards and you’re slowly but surely making your way through the entire series of Sex and the City for the hundredth time, but that’s not the point.
4. Divert the conversation to talking about the third party... does anyone even know who’s running for that party?!
Is Ralph Nader still around? Former NYC mayor Mikey Bloomberg? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? It could actually end up being a conversation that goes round and round, never getting anywhere... except away from the two-party political situation.
5. Bring up religion to throw your date for a loop – might as well cover all the big no-nos while you’re at it.
Hey, if it’s going to be awkward and you’re going to be forced to talk about something that really don’t want to, because throwing drinks at Republicans is sooo 2012, then you should just go big or go home. In other words, really dive into the religious conversation while you’re at it and watch the whole night burn down.
6. Say something completely and totally out of left field that will lead to nothing but confusion.
“I really wish Ted Cruz would get the Democratic nomination, because he seems to be the most qualified candidate out there… even if he’s from Kenya.” It hard to argue something that makes no sense and your date will immediately shut it down.
7. Dramatically drop your face into your palm and start to fake cry.
Sometimes the best thing you can do when you can’t wiggle yourself out of something is to fake cry. Loudly. Very loudly. Like, to the point where you make a scene so your date is forced to change the subject by focusing on what the hell is wrong with you. There's nothing wrong with you, of course; you just don't want to talk about effing politics on a date.